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This video made me laugh- I love that they whipped out their mobile phones to update their relationship statuses before hearing the final pronouncement. Of course, this is coming from a girl that updated her Facebook status a minute before walking down the aisle. 
While I admire the orchestration of this one (the logistics are insane, making me think John, the future groom, works for Disneyland), if Chris had proposed to me this way, I would have thought he was playing for the other team. (Hint: the other team is NOT Disney).
Take a peek and let me know what you think:
P.S. I did some research and found out that yes, you too can get engaged at Disneyland. If you want help from the Mouse, it will cost you anywhere from three hundred dollars (Rose Garden setup) to more than three-thousand dollars (what the guy in the video did). Here’s a comprehensive list for those of you swimming in money.
While researching the history of bridesmaids for Wedding Road Trip, I came across a story that had me choking on my coffee.
According to an article in the Daily Mail (circa 2008), one in five women ask their BFFs to sign a bridesmaid pre-nup. Included:
While I have a hard time believing this statistic is even remotely close to factual, I have to say that I am not surprised.
As a former bridesmaid (five times over), I have been pretty lucky. The dresses were nice, the brides chill, and the duties reasonable. Take a look at the picture to the left. Notice how happy I am to be wearing a lavender dress and holding a bouquet of flowers. You want to know why?
The bride didn’t suck.
That being said, other women around the bridal world have not been nearly as fortunate. For those bridesmaids, past, present, and future, I offer up the only recourse in my arsenal- the written word.
THE TEN BRIDESMAID COMMANDMENTS FOR THE NEWLY ENGAGED
*compiled through conversations with friends… not from personal experience
Thou shalt not tell your Maid of Honor that she must not get pregnant during your engagement period. You do not own her uterus.
Thou shalt not adorn your bridesmaids in dresses that purposely make them look fatter than you. Go to the gym.
Thou shalt not expect your out-of-state bridesmaids to attend more than one pre-wedding event. And share your frequent flier miles while you’re at it, you stingy beast.
Thou shalt not give all but one bridesmaid a special title, ie: “This is my Maid of Honor, Matron of Honor, and my Bridesmaid.” Cue the pigeons in Cinderella.
Thou shalt not expect reciprocity when your bridesmaids get married. Not everyone wants twenty-five BFFs standing next to them at their wedding.
Thou shalt not require honesty from your bridesmaids on the day of your wedding. The answer to “do I look fat and ugly in this dress” will always be “no” from your bridesmaids, even if you look like the Exxon Valdez, pre-oil spill.
Thou shalt remember to thank your bridesmaids during your wedding toast. Even if you hate them at this point, it will save you hours of arguments in the future.
Thou shalt not tell your bridesmaids how to “act” at your reception. If you’re worried that your Maid of Honor will disgrace herself in the bushes behind the church bingo hall, you probably should have left that friendship back in high school.
Thou shalt not favor one bridesmaid over another. Saying the phrase, “I had to add an extra bridesmaid because I needed both sides to be even,” may cause your friends to wonder who was the (unlucky) fifth.
Thou shalt not ask male bridesmaids to attend the bachelorette party. You’re emasculating them enough as is, trust me.
Ah yes. It wouldn’t be Halloween without someone trying to have an Addams Family/Munster/Nightmare Before Christmas themed wedding. Given that Halloween falls on a Saturday this year, it is likely that 666 boys and ghouls (yes, I hate bad puns just as much as you do) around the country are doing it scary style for their big days.
Make that six hundred and sixty five. A couple from New York, all geared up to get hitched in the legendary land of Sleepy Hollow, had their wedding called off after their pastor decided to remove himself from the ceremony.
Jeff Gargano, the head honcho at the famous Old Dutch Church in Sleepy Hollow, New York, told the couple he could not participate in their unholiest of matrimonies if they insisted on playing the theme songs from The Addams Family and The Muensters as they walked down the aisle.
According to Gargano,”Not all secular music would be inappropriate in a wedding. Some can be done. But we felt those two particular pieces - kind of ditties- were disrespectful,” said Gargano. He offered up some alternatives to the couple (do I hear a “Monster Mash” in there somewhere?) but they respectfully declined. The couple has instead chosen to marry in the privacy of their own home, complete with the the dulcet tones and snapping fingers of TV’s creepiest syndicated shows.
I find it interesting that in one part of the country, The Addams Family theme song is getting nixed while in another, Chris Brown’s “Forever” is garnering eight gazillion hits on YouTube because of a hackneyed walk down the aisle dance. Tying the knot to a tv theme song: bad. Getting married to a song written by a wife beater, thus adding cash to his bank account through iTune sales: good?
Suddenly, Ye Olde Wedding March is looking a whole lot more attractive…
Ladies (and certain sensitive gentlemen) who are engaged, if I have one piece of advice to give you that will save you years (and I do mean YEARS) of heartache and explanations…
Sandbag your wedding.
Yep, you heard me correctly- sandbag it.
Now I know that you were planning on going to the gym twice a day, drinking twelve glasses of water per meal, and eliminating everything from carbs to carrots in order to look perfect on your wedding day.
Don’t do it.
Instead, be your badass, normal self and walk down the aisle looking exactly as you do now, with a little bit of makeup and hair help from the beauty gods. Show those pearly whites and paint your nails, but do not try to attain the “perfect you” before you walk down the aisle.
As you look at the pictures two months after your big day, bemoaning how you should have ignored my advice and lifted weights for ten months before your blessed affair, remember this: you’ll thank me in five years. Because in five years, you’re going to look even hotter than you did on your big day. You’ll have worked out and eaten a balanced diet. If you were trying to lose any weight, it will have come off naturally without restricting your diet to foods that start with “Z”.
The best part? When people whip out your wedding photos, they won’t say, “wow, is this you?” in a voice that says, “girl…your day has passed.” Instead, they will look at you and say, “wow, you just keep getting better and better, don’t you?”
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