Because I want you to keep reading this blog, I promise not to go on about…

• The twenty-minute world music wedding reception without dialogue or the endless scenes of self-indulgent toasts.
• The fact that it felt like one of those Danish dogma films that are meant to punish the viewer.
• How the film featured the most PC wedding possible by blending every world culture imaginable into an incoherent cocktail of celluloid.

Now, I’m not judging the wedding itself…  people can do whatever they want to celebrate their union. Unless, of course, they plan on screening Rachel Getting Married.

So there were two pieces of good news that came from the movie:

I’m extra happy we are planning a simple, uncomplicated ceremony at the end of the road trip. Again, not judging anyone else, I ‘m just glad we’re not requiring all of our guests to make a toast, play a musical instrument, or make a quilt. It’s just a beach, a sunset, some food, some alcohol, and a DJ who will not play any 70s funk on threat of death.

After watching the film, I was reminded of how much I love Jaime’s family. I’m not just saying that because they read this blog. Rather, they are nice, good, straightforward, caring, and giving people, none of whom have a heroin addiction or the need to have a “who can fill the dishwasher the fastest” contest. I’m not filled with dread at the thought of visiting any of them on the road trip or hosting them at the wedding.

Unless, of course, Jaime has a psycho sister in rehab that I haven’t met yet. In that case, I rescind point #2 and ask you all to please tell me now, before it’s too late!

Side Note: On our road trip, we’ll be asking people about their in-laws, how well they get along, inevitable patterns or problems, and stories of great (and not so great) family members gained through marriage. If you’ve got anything you want to share before we leave, feel free to leave a comment!

So, what if someone tries this at my wedding? What if one of Jaime’s many male friends goes all out to steal her? (I’ll conveniently ignore the possibility of one of my many female friends trying the same on me.) Having security at the wedding is one option. Carrying a taser is another. Although if Patrick Dempsey comes charging onto the beach riding a horse, I’m screwed.