wedding road trip

Dial-a-Minister

Does anybody get married using a regular old “I’ve known him since I was two” minister anymore? It seems to be an increasing trend to dial a minister and make the marriage call using someone who is either a friend, relative, or professional officiant.

After all, who wouldn’t want to get married after this line:

“And now, by the power vested in me by the City of Modesto and the bankrupt state of California, I pronounce you husband and wife.”  Cue “Lovers in Japan” by Coldplay in our very own movie moment.

This is the guy who married us, my super awesome, Abercrombie model, friend-for-life, Todd:

Todd is not a minister, rather, he’s the press secretary for Congressman Alan Grayson. When we met, however, he was merely a goal-oriented college graduate, eager to make his mark in the world of journalism and television reporting. As our friendship progressed, he has achieved everything he has set out to do and more. Very few people have impressed me as much as Todd has over the years, so he was the obvious choice for the most important role in our final ceremony. Plus, he’s ridiculously charismatic and does a mean “Bust a Move.”

In order to become our minister, Todd became an ordained minister of the Universal Life Church of Modesto, California. He filled out a simple online form, clicked “ordain me” and then waited for the “official word.” While I’d like to think that a group of chain-smoking nuns review each applicant carefully before giving new “ministers” the a-ok, I think it’s about as likely as Kate Gosselin getting a reasonable haircut. I am guessing the “official word” he received went something like, “you’re cool, now send us fifty bucks.” My brother Rob married our younger brother Greg using the same service.

Wait. That didn’t come out right.

My brother Rob got a license to marry our younger brother Greg and his wife Melissa using the same Universal Life Church service.

Personally, I wouldn’t change a thing. Todd rocked the ceremony, the reception, and everything in between. I know that thirty years from now, when Todd is President of the United States (or perhaps the universe), that we’ll still be laughing over the snide Ohio State football comment he made during the intro and the little tiff he and I got into right before the exchanging of the rings. Having him as a minister made him a defacto part of our family and created a bond that can never be severed, unless he sleeps with my husband.

Tags: choosing a minister, dial a minister, ordained minister, universal life church